What a whirlwind it’s been.
When I started his journey Jan. 1, I had one goal in mind, one that I had nonchalantly been chasing and hoping to reach for almost two years.
That goal: to reach 230 pounds.
Now, nearly seven months ago I was just north of 281 pounds, so I knew it would take a lot of work to lose 51.
Early on the weight kept falling off. I surpassed 270, then 260. Before I knew it I got below 254, which was the lowest my weight I had been in my adult life.
At that pace (albeit I had some bad days here and there, I still do) I figured reaching 230 would be no problem.
But then I struggled to get below 250. Then falling below 245 was a challenge.
My goal of 230 was slowly slipping away. Still, I carried on.
Slowly but surely, 240 came and passed, and I saw the first two numbers of my weight I had longed for: 2-3.
Those other two numbers (the single and tenths of a pound) bounced up and down, but I inched closer to my new favorite number, 229.9.
I got to 235. Then to 234, and 233, and 232. I reached 231.1, which marked an even 50 pounds I had lost since the first of the year.
I was almost there! Only 1.2 more to go!
That was almost a month ago.
I have yet to shed that last 1.2 pounds.
Monday night (last night) after running in the afternoon and a doing a home workout, I weighed in at 231.8 (my weight has gone from as low as 230.4 to as high as 239 in the last three weeks).
I was confident that today (Tuesday) was going to be the day I surpassed 230. I woke up this morning and was 231 and some change, so I was even more confident. But after breakfast and my workout (playing basketball for an hour and a half), I did not see the number I wanted. I was 231.4.
Throughout the last six-plus months, I’ve had my fair share of ups and downs, but no valley in this journey compares to what I felt today when I saw a number I wasn’t expecting.
I was distraught. I was disappointed. I felt defeated.
For a month I’ve been struggling to pass 230 and get to 229.9. Today was supposed to be THE day!
But it didn’t happen.
And, as I sit here contemplating my next move, looking back at the last week and the last month to see where I went wrong and what I can do better, I got to thinking …
This journey is for more than just me.
I’ve been told by a number of people that the lifestyle change I’ve made has been a motivation to them.
The message that hit me the most?
Honest to god, you’ve inspired me. I’ve been following your journey discretely. With the changes you’ve made, and your hard work. You can do anything you set your mind to. Most importantly, your positive attitude. Keep grinding bro.
That’s a direct message I received on Twitter from a former athlete I used to cover. That sentiment was perhaps the single-most satisfying sentiment I have received. Yes, the “you look great” comment and any variant are indeed appreciated.
So, while I feel defeated today, I can think back to a couple quotes I made myself live by a few months ago.
I will not be defined by a number.
I am better than I was yesterday, but not as good as I will be tomorrow.
I can sit here (currently soaking my sore legs in my jacuzzi bathtub) and say that while I have been a motivation to some, sometimes even the motivator needs some motivation.
The above quotes definitely help, but I did a few quick searches online to find some others. Maybe you can be motivated by them too.
“Trust the process.” This actually came to me when I had this brief conversation on twitter.
legs r ded
— Chris Schanz (@c_schanz) July 27, 2016
— Caleb Martin (@Caleb_Martin9) July 27, 2016
.@Caleb_Martin9 allllll part of the process
— Chris Schanz (@c_schanz) July 27, 2016
That’s when I Googled “trust the process quotes” and found that.
Trust the process. These sore legs … part of the process. Not quite reaching my goal on a day with which I thought I would … part of the process. Realizing that tomorrow is another shot to accomplish that goal … part of the process.
Then I came across this:
Progress is still progress. The food choices. The running. The lifting. They are all part of the progress, part of the process. Trust the process.
And, while coming up with ways to motivate myself today, to continue to look at the positives of this whole thing — this long, stressful, at times satisfying, wonderful, exhausting, frustrating, worthwhile, amazing, sweaty, painful process — I was reminded of one quote that stuck out to me years ago while at Central Michigan University.
It is the title of this post, from the great Vince Lombardi.
“The only place success comes before work is in the dictionary.”
Here’s to a better tomorrow. A better me.
Trust the process.